It happens quite often that I talk with people about the behavior and attitude of others.

I just think it can be a fun and enlightening thing to do, and I believe we can learn a lot from exploring human madness.

Sometimes the person I’m chatting with will talk about others in a really condescending or very critical way, especially when it comes to their perceived laziness or lack of willpower.

‘They just take the easy way out’, ‘people like that are just addicted to victimhood’, or ‘they simply use everything they can to not have to get out there and do stuff!’

Of course, the person I’m talking to at that moment always perceives themselves as a prime example of how to grab life by the balls, instead of hiding cowardly in the darkness.

During those chats, there can be a lot of contempt for the people who just keep doing what they do, who keep struggling without any true results, and who don’t seem to clean up their act.

I get that.

And I had that, I guess.

But not anymore.

As a person who has overcome addiction, depression, anxiety, and an overall pitch black and cynical attitude towards life, I could, in theory, easily agree with the people who don’t appreciate the passive creatures in society and their ‘lousy attitude’.

It would feel pretty cool to be part of the exclusive club of People Who Don’t Give Up And Keep Winning.

As someone who has invested years and years and years in becoming a good copywriter, song maker, author, and coach, and a man who has spent countless hours learning how to stay healthy and fit AND making that a reality, I know about discipline and commitment and dedication, and that would be another reason to embrace the Survival of the Fittest-mentality.

Winners vs Losers.

YEAH!!!

But I don’t.

It’s not because I’m such a nice person, but simply because I don’t believe life works that way.

Some people will grow up always wanting more, and they will make that happen.

They’ll overcome huge piles of shit, thrive, fall down, and overcome shit again, and we’ll look up to them.

Those people are examples for many others, most others, but I truly believe they’re just set up by life to perform that unique and quite extreme role.

I, for instance, have a scary amount of discipline and patience, and although it seems I worked really hard to develop that and make it into a superpower, it just doesn’t make sense to claim it.

Although I was present when the hard work was done, although I wanted to give up a million times and somehow didn’t, it still doesn’t feel like a truly personal victory.

It would be an easy win, for sure, owning all the adversity and my battle to stay in the game, but it doesn’t align with how I perceive life.

Now I get it that some of the hard-ass people would say I’m presenting others with an excuse to do nothing about their circumstances, but to me, that looks like bullshit too.

People do stuff or they don’t.

Or they don’t do stuff for a very long time, and then do it anyway.

Or they don’t do anything and stay where they are, forever, and kinda fade out.

That’s just how all of this plays out.

It’s part of the dizzying diversity.

The lazy bum who became an ultra runner.

And the lazy bum who became even lazier (and there are just more of those).

I was obviously created to fuck up my life in many ways and bounce back completely and outrageously.

And I enjoy the shit out of that story and what it brought me, don’t get me wrong.

But it just doesn’t feel right to dwell on some sort of superiority.

I was just really, really lucky.

With everything, even the things that deeply sucked.

This notion doesn’t really change the sense of accomplishment and even some pride about the transformation, but that’s more about how it feels at this moment, it’s more about the amazing contrast, and I’m just not comfortable claiming that it was all me, because I know it wasn’t.

Some people will be much bigger heroes and role models than others (even though we can all be heroes in our own way, I totally acknowledge that).

If that wasn’t the case there wouldn’t be heroes and role models in the first place.

At the end of this little story, you might be left with the question ‘Uh, so is there really nothing we can do about it, Marnix, when it comes to transcending stuff, changing our reality, and making a better life?’

My answer is: there’s a lot we can do.

A LOT.

There are endless solutions and disciplines and ideas and insights and moments of transformation and profound change.

It’s just that we’re not really doing it.

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(Photo by @alexanderredl, for Unsplash)