This blog is inspired by a conversation I had this morning.

It’s about what I’ll call ‘false humility’.

You see it a lot in spiritual circles, and it’s this thing where people don’t take responsibility or credit for, or feel proud about, their part of the deal.

Because ‘everything is divine creation’.

Uhu.

It’s where coaches start to say ‘well, it’s not about me!’, and then look at you in this really devout way.

Like they earn spiritual points by taking themselves out of the equation.

Sure.

The same goes for insights, the holy grail and gold standard in coaching conversations.

Many coaches and teachers say that insights can strike all the time and everywhere, and I agree.

I have days that I can’t move without having a couple, even really big ones.

But I’d never advise someone who inquires about my coaching to just sit on a chair and wait for cool stuff to happen.

Even though there’s a fair chance it might.

In my experience over the years, the conversations and meetings I have with people, almost always create powerful shifts and insights.

There’s nothing random about that.

Now of course I wouldn’t claim that I’m personally responsible for producing the insights, but I definitely have been given a pretty cool role to play where the spontaneous birth of awakening ideas is a very common phenomenon.

I guess it would be weird to start promising or guaranteeing insights, but the opposite of that (‘yeah, well, maybe they’ll happen, sometimes…’) is also bullshit.

If, as a coach, your presence and experience are not conducive to shining new lights on stuff, what the fuck are you even doing?

Would you pay a hairdresser who tells you ‘most of the time my haircuts work out pretty well’?

Why is it truly, honestly helpful to pretend that you have nothing to do with the changes in people’s lives?

Is it really just because we’ve started to confuse ‘spirituality’ with not owning or claiming any involvement?

Of course, we never know what happens or will happen, that’s life for you, but there are still all kinds of obvious patterns, especially when you have coached for quite a while.

Not knowing what will happen doesn’t mean you can’t still trust that the result will be amazing anyway.

Here’s the thing: when we commit to new stuff (like becoming a spiritual coach), we also adopt new ideas and habits and quotations, and that’s totally fine.

But there’s no obligation to believe things that you’ve never really contemplated.

And I am contemplating my ass off.

You see, for many people in this particular realm it would be totally inappropriate to call yourself ‘an amazing coach with great results, really helping people out’.

Why?

Who made minimizing yourself and not accepting the role you’re obviously allowed to play in this life (an amazing coach) the Most Important Thing Ever?

Fuck that shit.

And here’s another baffling thing.

If the assumption is that this is all Oneness playing an intricate game, who cares about arrogance and taking credit and acknowledging your power?

There’s no person to claim all that in the first place, so you might as well enjoy it when it happens!

All of that frowned-upon stuff is as much a creation within life as the average humble spiritual coach bowing their ass off and pretending they don’t exist.

And that’s why I say:

Own your fucking deal.

Own your unique part.

Admit that you’re amazing at guiding apparently lost and separate souls towards having awesome new ideas and feelings and experiences, even though you have no clue why it happens and what you’re actually doing.

That doesn’t matter.

You don’t have to be afraid that by not sounding spiritual and humble and awake, you’ll lose your momentum.

There’s nothing to lose, or to prove.

All of this was given to you anyway, so you don’t have to defend it or keep earning it or pretend it means nothing.

You don’t have to look spiritual, and you don’t have to sound spiritual.

If you can help change lives by wearing a hat made out of old bananas, wear the damn hat.

It’s THAT simple.

To me, no amount of humility makes you a more valuable coach or a more valuable human being.

That is as made up as everything else, just in a more subtle way and with better PR.

And all those seemingly humble notions are not spiritually endorsed and coming from a higher frequency: they’re simply human preferences pretending to be divine laws.

Fuck, what an amazing blog!

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(Photo by @tafocando, for Unsplash)