{"id":47674,"date":"2022-08-09T09:03:43","date_gmt":"2022-08-09T09:03:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=47674"},"modified":"2022-08-09T09:03:51","modified_gmt":"2022-08-09T09:03:51","slug":"youre-not-what-you-do","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2022\/08\/09\/youre-not-what-you-do\/","title":{"rendered":"You’re not what you do."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

This morning I meditated for 8 minutes.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Half an hour prior to that, I\u2019d woken up with a heavy feeling that made me scroll YouTube for a bit of relief, and I found this little video.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For the moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For this morning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

During this session, a thought came up that said<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018You should do this more often.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So practical.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So predictable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

‘Remember this, do this more often, and the world will be better!’<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know that one, don’t you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yeah.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t meditate, unless I do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And I don\u2019t read anything into that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For me this is so obviously the nature of life, where curiosity or pain are temporarily followed, action is taken, and that\u2019s about it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If it was really up to me I\u2019d probably be a meditator.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or a non-dualist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or a self-help guru.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or a black belt whateverthefuck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But it\u2019s obviously not up to me, at all, and all these activities and interests just come and go, whether I love them or not and want to hang on to them or not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I meditate, most of the time I don\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I pray.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I eat a pint of Ben & Jerry\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s not who I am, it\u2019s simply what happens.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And what happens nowadays seems to be more natural and less restricted, much simpler and way less serious.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Turning things into important things is just life too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s what creates all the personal flavors and their differences, the stuff we can identify with and wear like societal outfits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A couple of years ago I hooked up with an agent who was supposed to bring me a lot of interesting gigs, like tv-appearances and lectures and all kinds of paid sessions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nothing happened.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They couldn\u2019t sell me as a specific Thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2018We don\u2019t know where to place you, or what to call you, sorry.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And that was a big problem, at least in a world where people hire other people because of cool keywords, smart descriptions, and gimmicky professions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That wasn\u2019t me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When I started to write this blog I didn\u2019t know where it would take me, but the general idea was to underline my lack of personal involvement and the randomness of things I do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most things I like for a little while, and sometimes I even get obsessed with them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And then one morning I wake up and they\u2019ve simply stopped being important.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s not my choice because it kinda sucks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But it\u2019s just like that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Life is that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To meditate or not, that\u2019s the question.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The answer is always found in the moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Photo by @khouser01, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This morning I meditated for 8 minutes. Half an hour prior to that, I\u2019d woken up with a heavy feeling that made me scroll YouTube for a bit of relief, and I found this little video. It was good. For the moment. For this morning. During this session, a thought came up that said \u2018You […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":47675,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[97,117,100,116,113,103,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47674"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=47674"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47674\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":47676,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47674\/revisions\/47676"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/47675"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47674"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=47674"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=47674"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}