{"id":47166,"date":"2022-06-23T10:21:43","date_gmt":"2022-06-23T10:21:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=47166"},"modified":"2022-06-23T11:53:49","modified_gmt":"2022-06-23T11:53:49","slug":"a-stupid-reason-to-hire-a-coach","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2022\/06\/23\/a-stupid-reason-to-hire-a-coach\/","title":{"rendered":"Do you need to have a coach, as a coach?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u2018Every coach should have a coach.\u2019<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know that one?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s a big thing in the world of coaching, where \u2018shoulds\u2019 are mostly frowned upon, except when it comes to hiring your own expert.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That seems to be an absolute must.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The argument for having a coach, as a coach, is generally something like \u2018Why would anybody hire you as a coach if you obviously don\u2019t believe in having a coach yourself?\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Wow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sounds about okay, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you first hear it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But it\u2019s actually a really, really stupid reason.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like: really.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It doesn\u2019t make sense at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In trying to make this wobbly argument stick, you often hear things like \u2018Well, if a doctor is really sick, they\u2019d consult with another doctor, or wouldn’t they?!\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well, maybe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Probably not so much when the doctor we\u2019re talking about, the sick one, is on her own in the jungle of Borneo, dealing with a snakebite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In other circumstances: sure, maybe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But it\u2019s still a stupid reason.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you want to hire a bookkeeper, would you expect them to have their personal administration handled by an external professional?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re thinking about getting a Personal Trainer to help get your lazy-ass body back in shape, would you dismiss them if it turns out they don\u2019t have their own PT?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Would you demand that the bicycle repairman with a flat tire on his bike visits another bicycle repairman to get it fixed?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of course not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know what?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This smells like fear to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like a lack of confidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like you don\u2019t really believe in what you do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proving the value of something you offer by using it yourself sounds reasonable, but it\u2019s really not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why would you NEED a coach if you are one?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And two: to me coaching is about getting rid of your blind spots, liberating your natural awesomeness, and finding a deep sense that you already have everything you need and you\u2019re good to go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And then you go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bye, bye coach, thanks so much, until we meet again!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

THAT, to me, sounds logical.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong: I\u2019ve been coached and I loved it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve had a few really good and powerful coaches in my life, and that was very helpful and insightful, but somewhere along the line I always get bored.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After a while I just know I can do it by myself, all of it, because that\u2019s what really good coaches help you realize.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It doesn\u2019t seem to me that a coaching relationship is about keeping the coaching relationship intact, forever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019ve learned what there is to learn, if you\u2019ve seen, really deeply seen, what there is to see, you can get on with your life and have cool adventures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And you’ll keep learning anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Solo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Or not solo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of course, it can be absolutely life-changing to have a coach, but only if you\u2019re up for it, only if there\u2019s something you need to learn or see or get rid of, only if you\u2019re unhappy or unfulfilled or simply don\u2019t see what you don\u2019t see.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But not to prove your worth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s just stupid.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Photo by @felipecorreia, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2018Every coach should have a coach.\u2019 You know that one? It\u2019s a big thing in the world of coaching, where \u2018shoulds\u2019 are mostly frowned upon, except when it comes to hiring your own expert. That seems to be an absolute must. The argument for having a coach, as a coach, is generally something like \u2018Why […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":47167,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[99,102,97,96,117,100,116,113,107,103,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47166"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=47166"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47166\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":47177,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/47166\/revisions\/47177"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/47167"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=47166"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=47166"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=47166"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}