{"id":46818,"date":"2022-05-21T10:05:34","date_gmt":"2022-05-21T10:05:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=46818"},"modified":"2022-05-21T10:05:40","modified_gmt":"2022-05-21T10:05:40","slug":"the-nature-of-integrity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2022\/05\/21\/the-nature-of-integrity\/","title":{"rendered":"The nature of integrity."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

It\u2019s funny.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

And also not so funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As the hero of this Marnix story, I could tell you proudly about my integrity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I stand 100% for how I look at life, and how I see coaching.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have absolutely no interest in watering down what I write, what I teach, and how I work with people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The idea of not committing to my deepest truths is simply unbearable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So I don\u2019t compromise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I can\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I LITERALLY can’t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And that automatically describes the other side of what\u2019s going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The funny part.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The integrity is not a divine choice I made, some deliberate and well-contemplated step, or an honorable activity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s simply how life created this particular story.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So it\u2019s not really mine to own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn’t do it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What could be called ‘my integrity’ is not a real moral struggle that keeps me fighting every day: I just can\u2019t do what I can\u2019t do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And I can\u2019t do something that is more mainstream and generally easier on the eyes and ears of the public, so more people will appreciate it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well, in theory I could, but for real I just can\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like I said: funny, and not so funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes this deep pull towards the personal path feels very fucking inconvenient and confusing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I wish it wouldn\u2019t play out like this, and that I could just fake it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know SO MUCH about the self-help-o \u2019sphere, I am SO WELL connected to creativity, and I have SO MUCH experience as a writer, that I could easily own any kind of method or ideology.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I even could be vomiting up new self-help concepts on a daily basis.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At least, in theory.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But in reality, I can\u2019t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m forced to explore what I\u2019m exploring, forced to keep writing in the direction my writing wants to go, and forced to coach from the only place I know to be fresh and real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lovingly forced, that is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Funny how this all unfolds, how I don\u2019t get what I thought I wanted, and how the things I DO get after wanting them for a long time, don\u2019t feel as expected (duh).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It seems to me that integrity is not a choice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s a certainty you simply can\u2019t dismiss.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fucking funny.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Photo by @fkaregan, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It\u2019s funny. And also not so funny. As the hero of this Marnix story, I could tell you proudly about my integrity. I stand 100% for how I look at life, and how I see coaching. I have absolutely no interest in watering down what I write, what I teach, and how I work with […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":46819,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[97,117,100,116,113,103,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46818"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=46818"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46818\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":46820,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46818\/revisions\/46820"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/46819"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=46818"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=46818"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=46818"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}