{"id":46436,"date":"2022-03-15T12:15:46","date_gmt":"2022-03-15T12:15:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=46436"},"modified":"2022-03-15T12:15:48","modified_gmt":"2022-03-15T12:15:48","slug":"the-gift-of-confusion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2022\/03\/15\/the-gift-of-confusion\/","title":{"rendered":"The gift of confusion."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

There are SO many cycles.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

During the day, during the week, and throughout our lives.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Purely physically, or dressed up as moods.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cycles in how we look at ourselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cycles in energy and inspiration.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And even spiritual cycles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One of the fields where I see it played out all the time, is coaching.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In my job I can feel incredibly, crazy confident for a while, only to see that vanish again, just like that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know most people call it Impostor Syndrome, but I am not a big fan of labels or turning human experiences into things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(If you stop doing that, they can be the fleeting experiences they are in the first place.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s incredible power in recognizing how these things keep coming back, all of them and over and over again, and if you start to get a feel for those completely natural movements, they don\u2019t feel as desperate and scary as they used to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What I have seen is that periods of confusion and lack of confidence are somehow connected to growth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The more fucked up I seem to be, the more I am changing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This automatically implicates that \u2018bad times\u2019 are actually a setup and a prerequisite for really good ones.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It means that confusion is nothing more than an enticing smokescreen that will dissolve by itself, somewhere along the line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong: I LOVE feeling confident and I totally believe that is how we are born and how we are \u2018supposed\u2019 to live.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But over time, I have learned there will be moments where all seems lost and everything is gone and we feel like total failures.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Knowing about the cycles makes a huge difference.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because being confused feels less confusing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Feeling desperate is not as crushing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And the Impostor Syndrome really turns out not to be a syndrome after all, but a part of the change, a fleeting element within the ebb and flow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Up, down, a little bit more up than before, and a bit down again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s how it goes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Up again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A bit of confusion, not that much confidence, a hint of despair.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And then we go up again, towards new and wonderful insights.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They are just cycles.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No worries.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They are gifts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Photo by @iamsherise, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are SO many cycles. During the day, during the week, and throughout our lives. Purely physically, or dressed up as moods. Cycles in how we look at ourselves. Cycles in energy and inspiration. And even spiritual cycles. One of the fields where I see it played out all the time, is coaching. In my […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":46437,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[99,102,97,96,100,116,113,107],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46436"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=46436"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46436\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":46438,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/46436\/revisions\/46438"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/46437"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=46436"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=46436"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=46436"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}