{"id":45966,"date":"2022-01-12T14:33:13","date_gmt":"2022-01-12T14:33:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=45966"},"modified":"2022-01-12T14:56:55","modified_gmt":"2022-01-12T14:56:55","slug":"finding-your-way-out-of-addiction-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2022\/01\/12\/finding-your-way-out-of-addiction-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding your way out of addiction."},"content":{"rendered":"\n

When I quit drinking after decades of severe abuse, I thought life would become easy.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Boy was I wrong -though not completely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Eventually, yes, eventually life became easier, sweeter, more joyful, and simple.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Eventually.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But not at first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The thing with drinking or any other addiction is that it\u2019s very helpful and effective and powerful and practical.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As a matter of fact: in many respects, life was way easier when I still drank.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The alcohol was the solution for almost anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sadness: booze.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Worry: wine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Shame: vodka.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Existential confusion: whatever gave me a buzz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Being fucked up about being fucked up: let\u2019s get more fucked up!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alcohol was the perfect short-term answer to most of my questions, and because I started drinking at such a young age, I had no skills to fall back on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Alcohol made the discomfort bearable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And I totally lost that when I gave it up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It transported me to a place of nothingness, and I stayed there for quite a while, stumbling around, lost, hurt, confused.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not exaggerating when I tell you that it took me several years to finally find some much-needed, sober grounding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For a long time, there was just this no man\u2019s land between old habits and new ways, where I felt totally lost and utterly vulnerable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s exactly why \u2018falling off the wagon\u2019 (I hate that phrase with a vengeance, by the way) is so common, and so logical, and so understandable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It was bad, very bad.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, when you take all of this into consideration, why would you even start the journey from addiction to non-addiction?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Can\u2019t you just stay a bit addicted, one foot in, the other out?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well, that’s a question you\u2019ll have to answer for yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not just because it\u2019s you who\u2019ll have to go on that uncertain adventure, but also because the answer will be your inspiration and reason to exist and take it from there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not interested in convincing anyone to do or live whatever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not anti-alcohol, anti-drugs, or anti-whatever.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The simple thing is: we have to find our own reasons, our own calling, our own power, and if that\u2019s something you\u2019re not interested in, if you\u2019d rather stay in the relative comfort of your habits, it\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s up to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quitting, not quitting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trying, not trying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s up to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Isn\u2019t that the most powerful realization ever?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Photo by @anshu18, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When I quit drinking after decades of severe abuse, I thought life would become easy. Boy was I wrong -though not completely. Eventually, yes, eventually life became easier, sweeter, more joyful, and simple. Eventually. But not at first. The thing with drinking or any other addiction is that it\u2019s very helpful and effective and powerful […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":45967,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[99,102,97,117,100,116,113,103,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45966"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=45966"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45966\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":45970,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/45966\/revisions\/45970"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/45967"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=45966"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=45966"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=45966"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}