Would you agree that life is better without worrying all the time?<\/p>\n
Yes?<\/p>\n
Good, then stop worrying.<\/p>\n
Just stop it.<\/p>\n
Cool huh!<\/p>\n
What?<\/p>\n
You can\u2019t?<\/p>\n
I know.<\/p>\n
I know it seems that way, for sure.<\/p>\n
And I know why you keep doing it, even if you somehow understand that it\u2019s not really serving you.<\/p>\n
One:<\/em> it\u2019s an automated process, a self-activating and self-sustaining process.<\/p>\n You can sit on the couch without a worry in the world, having tea, when BANG! a worrying idea arises.<\/p>\n Following those ideas, those spooky mental suggestions, is also a habit, so you\u2019re doubly fucked.<\/p>\n Two:<\/em> you really, genuinely believe it\u2019s helpful.<\/p>\n You probably even believe it\u2019s not just useful, but also necessary.<\/p>\n That worrying is the best way to solve problems, that endless rumination results in many good answers and solutions.<\/p>\n But it doesn\u2019t.<\/p>\n It closes you off dramatically from a much larger source of ideas and answers and insights.<\/p>\n People NEVER create brilliant solutions from worrying.<\/p>\n Three:<\/em> if the things you worry about don’t happen, to a brain that is wired for survival and habits it looks like worrying was a really helpful strategy.<\/p>\n It’s a false cause-effect situation, but the brain will probably keep doing it and even find more evidence for its success.<\/p>\n Four<\/em> (and this is a really interesting one): without knowing it, probably without ever having reflected on it, you use worrying as a form of superstition.<\/p>\n As if worrying satisfies the Gods of Disaster who are always watching you, waiting for you to slip up and stop taking life seriously for a second, so they can fuck you up.<\/p>\n As if you can’t afford to just feel good.<\/p>\n In a way, worrying is a really common addiction: it SEEMS to be a solution for feeling bad right now, it PRETENDS to be helpful, but it only gets you in more trouble, which just makes you worry more.<\/p>\n Worrying seems justified and unavoidable, but it\u2019s mostly an unhealthy and unhelpful form of distraction.<\/p>\n It’s like bringing in the dark when what you need is more light.<\/p>\n You see that?<\/p>\n Good.<\/p>\n And now you want me to tell you what to do about it?<\/p>\n I don\u2019t have a solution.<\/p>\n But don\u2019t be disappointed.<\/p>\n It only means there\u2019s no real problem.<\/p>\n —<\/p>\n (Photo by @priscilladupreez, for Unsplash)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Let me ask you something. Would you agree that life is better without worrying all the time? Yes? Good, then stop worrying. Just stop it. Cool huh! What? You can\u2019t? I know. I know it seems that way, for sure. And I know why you keep doing it, even if you somehow understand that it\u2019s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":35030,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[99,102,97,117,100,116,113,103,112],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35029"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=35029"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35029\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":35035,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/35029\/revisions\/35035"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/35030"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=35029"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=35029"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=35029"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}