{"id":30847,"date":"2020-05-21T11:50:05","date_gmt":"2020-05-21T11:50:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=30847"},"modified":"2020-05-21T11:50:05","modified_gmt":"2020-05-21T11:50:05","slug":"just-holding-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2020\/05\/21\/just-holding-it\/","title":{"rendered":"Just holding it."},"content":{"rendered":"
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I have no reason to feel sad.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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But I do.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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There\u2019s no need to change it (although I\u2019m used to trying, a lot).<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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And I\u2019m not looking for comfort (although I\u2019m writing a blog about this).<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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There\u2019s just sadness happening in my experience.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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That\u2019s all.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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But is it?<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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What is so bad about sadness?<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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What is wrong with feeling lost, or melancholic, or even desperate?<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Well, I guess we just don\u2019t love it enough.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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There you have it.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Or maybe you do, and I shouldn\u2019t generalize so much.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I don\u2019t love it enough, or I didn\u2019t.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Because I feel that\u2019s changing, I\u2019m loving, creating space around this moment.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Right now I feel sad and a bit lonely, without any reason, but when I look it in the eyes from a neutral space, when I courageously explore it to find the painful edges and the burning darkness and all the other things I seem to dread so much, I can\u2019t find it.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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It\u2019s like I\u2019m gently rocking a scared little bear.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I\u2019m not the bear.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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I\u2019m just holding it.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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—<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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(Photo by @macrojr, for Unsplash)<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I have no reason to feel sad. But I do. There\u2019s no need to change it (although I\u2019m used to trying, a lot). And I\u2019m not looking for comfort (although I\u2019m writing a blog about this). There\u2019s just sadness happening in my experience. That\u2019s all. But is it? What is so bad about sadness? What […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":30848,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[97,117,100,116,113,103],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30847"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=30847"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30847\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30849,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30847\/revisions\/30849"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/30848"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=30847"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=30847"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=30847"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}