{"id":30621,"date":"2020-02-19T12:39:35","date_gmt":"2020-02-19T12:39:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/?p=30621"},"modified":"2020-02-19T12:50:56","modified_gmt":"2020-02-19T12:50:56","slug":"winning-the-worry-game","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/2020\/02\/19\/winning-the-worry-game\/","title":{"rendered":"Winning the worry game."},"content":{"rendered":"<h4>What appeals to you more?<\/h4>\n<p>To never ever worry about money again, or<\/p>\n<p>to have an enormous amount of money?<\/p>\n<p>At a glance, the first might sound a lot like the second.<\/p>\n<p>The first even seems to be a synonym for the latter.<\/p>\n<p>But it isn\u2019t.<\/p>\n<p>Not worrying about your finances has got nothing to do with the amount of dough you have.<\/p>\n<p>You can be a billionaire and constantly live in a crippling fear of losing it.<\/p>\n<p>And you can be really poor but feel utterly blessed by the things the universe has bestowed upon you (like water, oxygen, stars, family or the capacity to love).<\/p>\n<p>Having an enormous amount of money (which is different for every single person on the planet, by the way) has no causal effect on your wellbeing.<\/p>\n<p>You might feel good and safe and free because you\u2019ve learned that\u2019s what money provides, but it\u2019s not a solid given.<\/p>\n<p>Doubts might still creep in (they probably will), people still die, lovers will leave you no matter what, and you could worry night and day about becoming seriously ill without noticing it.<\/p>\n<p>Now, of course I&#8217;m not saying that you shouldn&#8217;t want money, or lots of sex, or a shiny career, or stuff.<\/p>\n<p>Stuff can be really cool.<\/p>\n<p>But it\u2019s way cooler to be just cool no matter what.<\/p>\n<p>Not worrying about stuff is where it\u2019s truly at.<\/p>\n<p>Because it\u2019s not actually subject to interpretation: not worrying feels good to all of us.<\/p>\n<p>(Unless, of course, you live in the idea that worrying is helpful and practical and beneficial.)<\/p>\n<p>Not worrying opens up a world of endless possibilities, instead of keeping you confined to the things you already know, endlessly looking for new magic in old thoughts and stale ideas.<\/p>\n<p>Not worrying so much means having a better time most of the time (since worrying feels kinda bad and constricted), while giving you a better chance of coming up with fresh solutions.<\/p>\n<p>Now, it\u2019s not so much a thing you do, not worrying, but more of a realization.<\/p>\n<p>First you see the uselessness of it, and then you naturally become more aware of your inclination to take that depressing, suffocating route, and you simply start going there as much as you used to.<\/p>\n<p>\u2018No thanks, not today!\u2019<\/p>\n<p>And the tiny amount of worry that is the beginning of ALL the CRAZY BIG ones, simply loses momentum, and dies.<\/p>\n<p>You win half an hour of worry free time.<\/p>\n<p>The next day 12 minutes.<\/p>\n<p>And it slowly becomes a new habit, a new skill, this becoming alert to the old programming, the old inclination to lie down on the worry couch and cry yourself to sleep.<\/p>\n<p>Day by day, situation by situation, you get more freedom around staying in the light instead of jumping into the darkness.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s a little like going to the gym, but without other people and weights and monthly fees and protein shakes.<\/p>\n<p>You might even make it into a game, strengthening your no worry-muscle in the process.<\/p>\n<p>\u2018No thanks, not today!\u2019<\/p>\n<p>Boom, next level!<\/p>\n<p>And then one day you realize that freeing up your life from ruminating has given you way more creativity and joy and focus and curiosity and a bigger awareness of opportunities.<\/p>\n<p>You start to do what you love instead of avoiding what you hate.<\/p>\n<p>And th\u00e1t, my dear friend, is living in cool.<\/p>\n<p>What appeals to you more?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What appeals to you more? To never ever worry about money again, or to have an enormous amount of money? At a glance, the first might sound a lot like the second. The first even seems to be a synonym for the latter. But it isn\u2019t. Not worrying about your finances has got nothing to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":30622,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[97,117,100,116,113,103],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30621"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=30621"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30621\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":30624,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/30621\/revisions\/30624"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/30622"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=30621"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=30621"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/marnix.nl\/homepage\/welkom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=30621"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}